Beating the Baconpocalypse
- OCTOBER 4, 2012
- By Noelle Paul
According to recent reports, by this time next year, there could be a significant shortage
of bacon. Yes, as hard as it is to believe, this crisis is a very real issue. Between droughts
causing an increase in the cost of grain, which then causes higher prices for animal feed,
and a cut back on herd size, the ones who have suffered the most are the pigs; however,
as farmers and pigs undergo these tumultuous times, so do the rest of us who crave the
crunch from a piece of hot, greasy, bacon. Already being labeled “Baconpocalypse,”
by bacon enthusiasts everywhere, this growing concern poses the question: “What will
we do without the savory taste of bacon, if the Baconpocalypse actually happens?! Will breakfast ever be the same again?”
Have no fear bacon lovers, bacon flavored EVERYTHING is here.
While I don’t recommend eating this product, that greasy, savory taste that you know and love from your favorite pork product, can now be enjoyed day and night with this tube of Bacon Toothpaste. Each brush will feel like a tiny burst of breakfast.
After they’ve brushed their teeth with the scrumptious sensation of Bacon Toothpaste, help them carry out that flavor throughout the day, with Bacon Lip Balm. This meaty lip balm is sure to prevent their chops from chapping!
After ingesting bits of Bacon Beans and lathering their lips with Bacon Balm, help them chase the flavor with Bacon Soda. Yes, you read correctly, Bacon Soda. Just when they were about to panic at the thought of a life without bacon, this smoky soda came along and reassured them that the gratifying taste of bacon isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. Cheers!